Barack Goes "Postal," Shoots Self in Foot!

© 2009, by The Conservative Muse

These days there’s significant fur taken flight,

From the health care debate that’s now more of a fight.

Both sides are unruly, and raising the heat

With “Nazis” and tough union thugs on the beat.

But a bunch of this stuff is in truth quite amusing,

In particular, strategies libs are now using

To peddle their dear “Public Option” that sees

Big government raised to the highest degrees.

Barack and his minions have tried to insist

That private and government firms can exist

In markets in which their main trade intersects -

Like the Post Office, plus UPS and Fed Ex.

Whoops! The One’s made an error of poor cogitation:

Since when’s the P.O. the exemplification

Of a government agency known for efficiency?

Instead it defines bureaucratic deficiency!

With famous incompetence, billions in losses,

Employees gone “postal” a threat to their bosses,

E’en The One says it’s always in trouble – and yet

Public Option would mean doubling down on that bet!

So the Post Office stands as a noteworthy case

Of successful Fed groups in a privatized place?

Sure… like Custer’s an icon for Plains battle tactics,

Or that Mom of octuplets for good prophylactics;

Like Amelia Earhart for safety in flight,

Or the quaint Barney Frank for a UFC* fight.

This silly analogy is, simply put,

King Barack chowing down on a sandwich of foot!

The One has a Special Delivery gift:

Single payer “reform” that would show how we drift

So doggedly left as he tries to fulfill

Campaign vows to unions who act as his shill.

Like Overnight Mail, King Barack’s in a hurry

To pass a health bill, though its contents are blurry.

But it only will cost a cool trillion or so,

And it’s easy enough to just print up the dough

Plus there’s plenty of taxes on wealth to bestow,

And the Left’s getting tense – let’s get on with the show!

* - Ultimate Fighting Championship