The Wizard of O: Has Barack taken cues from Oz?

© 2008, by The Conservative Muse

It's almost enough to bring tears to your eyes,

America’s stature increasing in size

amongst the world’s nations because of The One

whose election foretells a new policy spun

from goodness and warmth and that fuzzy good feeling

that misty-eyed libs find so doggone appealing.

 

Like first lady Michelle, we can say that we’re proud

for once in our lives, so let’s shout it out loud:

“We admit we’ve done wrong, but now things are just great;

We elected a black man as Head of the State!

There’re seeds for big change that we’re hoping to sow!

(We’re high on that ‘Hope’ and that ‘Change’ thing, you know…)”

But meantime, far back in the world of reality,

Our fiscal well-being shows signs of mortality --

Seems Wall Street’s ignoring the globalized blizzard

of euphoric conditions cooked up by that wizard

who ran a campaign based on punishing wealth,

with high taxes to hurt our economy’s health.

 

Will he govern as far to the left as he ran?

Is redistribution a part of the plan?

Will wacky Joe Biden make good on his oath

To buy toasters for folks who missed out on our growth?

Such policies tell us what’s looming ahead:

There’ll be little, if any, more wealth to be spread!

 

We hope this is true: Barack’s playing the game

Employed by that Wizard of Hollywood fame.

Like Oz, his persona’s a frightful illusion,

While an actual centrist awaits, in seclusion,

his time to step forward and end the confusion…

 

Nah…we’re simply indulging a soothing delusion!

 

Chris Falls In Love

© 2008, by The Conservative Muse

It’s truly amazing how large is the trade

For product that’s quaintly called “marital aid.”

There’s movies and oils, sexy clothing, and such; 

These things make us blush, but we do know this much:

To get in the mood for erotic, hot fun,

There’s naught like a speech from Obama, The One.

It’ll cause a big thrill to run upside your leg; 

Your mind will be blown as you slobber and beg

To hear even more of his gifted oration;

Endorphins will gush in a flood of sensation!

You’ll hallucinate visions of Lincoln, and then, 

once you’re spent, you’ll demand it again and again!

This orgasmic reaction’s been finely portrayed

by NBC’s newsman Chris Matthews, who brayed

like Barack was so great the mere sound of His voice

convinced him The One was the optimal choice!

With stars in his eyes, and a cramp in his brain,

Chris pledged all his efforts to help with His reign!

Well gee, pardon us, but we always believed 

The job of a journalist wasn’t conceived

To run all the cheers for particular leaders

and sway the opinions of viewers or readers.

We guess we’re naïve in expressing the views

That newsmen should stick to reporting the news.

The Muse wouldn’t ever restrict one’s free speech

Or muzzle Chris Matthews’ annoying raw screech.

If MSNBC wants to go on and spew

Its orthodox liberal policy brew, 

At least they should say that they’re bidding adieu

To objective reporting – and principles, too!

The Dems Get a Spokesman!

© 2008, by The Conservative Muse

Oh my, can’t you feel it? The “change” in the air?
Those winds kicking dirt and disheveling hair?
The strength of their gusts should suffice to remind you
A part of your stuff’s owed to someone “behind” you.
The redistributionist breezes are here
And Congressman Jimmy Moran leads the cheer!

This Virginian Democrat really did state
The following during a Town Hall debate
(We swear that it’s true, though it’s stranger than fiction):
Republicans have the “simplistic” conviction
“that people (with) wealth are entitled to keep it.”
As if, though they’ve sown it, they can’t ever reap it!

But wait! We’re not done! ‘Cause Moran then opines:
“They have an antipathy” ‘gainst all those kinds
Of laws “redistributing” much of their money.
Is this wacko for real, or thinking he’s funny?
He surely ignites some evocative sparks
Of that comedy duo named Lenin and Marx!

The Muse likes to think he’s above all the fray;
He’s classy enough that he never would say
The “change” on our Jim that we ought to bestow
Is swapping the “a” in his name for an “o”….
But clearly his rants can be taken to show
Barack and the Dems plan on spreading the dough!

Barack Performs a Miracle

© 2008, by The Conservative Muse

There’s something the Muse has a need to admit,

a confession of sorts that he’d herewith submit.

He’s not a big fan of Obama, for sure,

nor happy for socialist plans we’ll endure.

You'll think that the Muse is just babbling insanely,

But Barack’s worked a miracle, putting it plainly.

It’s not that he won the election, Lord knows;

The deck was well-stacked ‘gainst McCain by his foes

At effectively all of the media’s stations

Who hid Barack’s past through unjust calculations:

Bill Ayers, Khalidi, and Fannie Mae’s woes

Were deemed less important than Palin’s new clothes.

And Al Qaeda’s still active, Iran’s getting nukes;

The world is still run by that gaggle of kooks

Who were only too happy to give their endorsement

To The One who’s unlikely to give much enforcement

To battling terrorist groups and their minions;

He’d rather sit down and discuss their opinions.

And we don’t give Him credit for causing the weather

In London when Parliament gathered together

To “stop” global warming by passing tough laws,

A coincidence sure to draw loudest guffaws

Since it snowed for the first time in seventy years --

Who’da thought CO2 could’ve frozen their rears!

No - the planet's not healed and the world hasn't changed,

The universe still hasn't been rearranged, 

but let's be assured we're not misunderstood:

Barack should be praised - yes, he honestly should – 

for doing what nobody else ever could:

He truly made Hillary Clinton look good!