The Libs' Terror of War

© 2007, by The Conservative Muse

We hear from the libs of a genre of persons

With no civil rights and a status that worsens

Each day they’re in prison through wrongful detention.

We plucked them from battle with evil intention 

And now we’re denying those poor tortured souls

Their rightful Geneva Convention controls.

No proof that indicts them will jailers produce, 

So libs would like lawyers to turn them all loose. 

Those people for whom all those tears have been shed

Would just as soon cut off a liberal’s head

Or blow up a market with improvised bombs

To maximize losses to kids and their moms.

They’re aiming for death counts to rise meteoric

To reach their ideal of times prehistoric

When women wear birkas and stay in their homes

In shadows of infinite caliphate domes.

They fashion, pursuant to pleas from their mullah,

A suicide bomb out of any Abdullah.

There’s reason they blow themselves up, we surmise:

They meet all those virgins upon their demise.

(We think that, per man, they get seventy-two,

though heightened demand may reduce it a few.)

Just listen to Dems and you’ll see they don’t get

That all of these madmen can pose such a threat

To set off a dirty or nuclear fission –

They say such a fear’s part of Bush’s ambition

To build up the Patriot Act, which invites 

destruction of key constitutional rights. 

They rage that the Bushies will spy on us all –

And check on an innocent terrorist’s call!

Libs laugh at the jingoist phrase “War on Terror;”

“A lawsuit for every Jihadist!” sounds fairer.

We know why the heads of Al Qaeda espouse

that Democrats lead both the Senate and House:

Our fervor for taking the offense they’ll douse

And change us from lion to Mickey the Mouse.

Barack Goes to Church

© 2008, by The Conservative Muse

Oh boy!  Here’s a problem that’s causing distress 

To maybe derail the Obama Express!

It’s hard to believe, and such terrible luck --  

his pastor’s turned out to be such a big schmuck.

Can it really be true that Barack didn’t know?

Were there cards in his deck that the Rev didn’t show?!

And all poor Obama was trying to do

Was get all those thousands of folks in the pew

To back his campaigns when it came time to run

For offices once his career had begun. 

And now, who’da known that this logical choice

Would come back to haunt through the radical voice 

of Reverend Wright, who’s a hate-spewing bearer 

of news about chickens and AIDS and of terror

inflicted by evil American presidents

on ill-fated Afro-American  residents.

When faced with defending the Reverend Wright,

Barack said our racism’s cause for his spite.

While building his case for the jury to see, 

He utilized limbs from a family tree: 

The Rev’s an old uncle that nobody heeds,

who talks like he’s crazy and plays with his beads.

(We doubt that our nutty old uncle is spouting

Invective to throngs who accept it, undoubting.)

And then there’s the case of his dear old (white) Granny,

Described by Barack, in words truly uncanny,

As a “typical white person” having innate

Animosities featuring racialist hate.  

(Could this pounding on Grandma been done a bit lighter?

Did she know, when she fed him, that someday he’d bite ‘er?)

So far the defense of his pastor has been:

“Let’s give him a break, we’re all guilty as sin…”

Instead of disowning this man so bizarre,

He chooses to tell us what bigots we are.

This country’s come far on the issue of race:

Is Obama aware that he’s now in first place?

We’ll see if the voters are apt to embrace

His flaunting their weakness all over the place. 

Memo To Michelle: "SHUT UP!"

© 2008, by The Conservative Muse

Though life has been good for Barack and Michelle

Her speeches suggest that it must’ve been hell

Attending both Princeton and Harvard, and then

Exploring for corporate jobs with a yen

For making a couple of hundred a year --

All this while her husband pursued a career

To catapault into a Senator’s seat,

And then for the President’s job to compete.

Their Afro-American triumphs, we’d think,

Are proof that American life doesn’t stink

When judged by the chances for upward mobility:

There’s lots of those white folks who’d like their stability!
While hubby campaigns for the main nomination

Michelle’s been engaging in this conversation:

America’s “mean” and “we’re guided by fear,”

Its people are fighting to just persevere

In a land of “complacents”, of “sloths,” and of “cynics;”

For trashing our country she’s putting on clinics….

Our health care’s restricted, our schools are a mess;

Refuting lib mantra of Clinton’s success,

She says life has gotten progressively worse

For most of us bearing America’s curse

These past couple decades (including Bill’s reign);

Of course, she’s got lots about which to complain!

Some libs will implore, “Hate America first!”

We’re big international bullies who thirst

Not only for power but too large a share

Of global reserves -- and then poison the air.

Could this be the thinking Michelle voiced aloud

When saying Obama’s success made her proud

Of the U. S. of A. for just once in her life?

Could this be a case of like-husband, like-wife?

In spite of her earnings, she’s gotten the nerve

To ask of our kids that they all try to serve

In low-paying jobs such as nursing or teaching;

Are views from a hypocrite worthy of preaching?

So far, in her speeches it seems she’s preferred

To flip the U.S. the proverbial bird.

Michelle – just like Bill – should be getting the word:

Some spouses are better off seen and not heard.

Tinseltown Mourns a Lefty

© 2008, by The Conservative Muse

Shhhhhhhh…..

A moment of silence is due, we believe,

For Hollywood liberals trying to grieve

For someone who’s leaving a really big stage – 

It’s not that he died, he’s just reached an old age.

His Tinseltown fans are a lefty’s Who’s Who:

There’s Redford, Dicaprio; Harrelson, too;

Ed Asner, Kev Costner, and Oliver Stone

Have traveled to kneel at the base of his throne.

What grand, famous figure compels their affection? 

A movie producer? One known for direction?

These film types have searched far beyond their profession 

To find as their object of leftist obsession

That lovable, cute, so adorable tyrant: 

Fidel from Havana – that Marxist aspirant!

Libs swoon ‘cause his socialist state is intact;

Jack Nicholson called him a “genius,” in fact.

Chevy Chase also praised the “success” of his nation; 

(We’d guess Chevy’s brain is still out on “Vacation!”)

Of course, Belafonte and Glover chipped in

Their anti-Bush voice to the pro-Castro din.

And though his guerilla-like look seems unkempt,

He got models Campbell and Moss all ferklempt. 

What’s missing, of course, is the cold, hard reality

Of frequent reports of an early mortality 

Among many thousands of Cuban dissenters;

That must be the price tag of having as mentors

The Castro boys, Che, and their communist mates.

At least it cuts down on the homelessness rates!

While libs all view Cuba as Marxist utopia,

A sole observation will prove their myopia:

There’s ninety-odd miles of unsheltered deep sea

That threaten the multitudes trying to flee

From where there’s repression to life that is free;

The traffic’s one way -- to the Florida key.

An Ode To Michael Moore

© 2007, by The Conservative Muse

His movie career is one big contradiction:

he makes documentaries chock-full of fiction.

With filmmaking styling that’s highly uncouth 

(both Sicko and Fahrenheit mangle the truth)

he garners awards with adoring reviews;

The Left has proclaimed him its favorite Muse.

          

He looks like a slob ‘cause he tries to evoke

The thought that he’s one of the working-class folk 

Who labor for cruel, uncaring employers.

(If Michael shows up they’ll all run for their lawyers!)

Portraying himself as the workers’ defender, 

His lifestyle will prove that he’s just a pretender:

Of million-buck homes he’s in happy possession,

For raking in money he’s got an obsession.

His kids are schooled privately lest they should mix

With children of all of those blue-collar hicks. 

When touring he’ll settle in five-star hotels –

for hating big business he sure knows what sells!

While savoring capitalistic success

in Europe he lectures the socialist press

on evil America’s poisonous greed.

In opulent limos this lefty will speed

To make thirty grand for a speech that he’ll read. 

As hypocrites rank, he’s a number one seed!