The Muse Confesses: "I Want to be Arrested!"

© 2008, by The Conservative Muse

Like mortals, the Muse wants financial security,

But he’s not gonna get it accepting obscurity.

So he’ll garner some fame through a tactic well-tested:

The Muse will conspire to be boldly arrested.

But not the way O. J. went into the can –

Those crimes aren’t befitting our poetry man.

To fulfill his high purpose there’s no better way

Than by picking a fight with the U. S. of A.

He’ll grow a long beard, don a white, flowing robe,

Like Muslim fanatics all over the globe.

He’ll shoot off a weapon, then beg for a stay

With those icons of chic at Guantanamo Bay.

According to libs, these poor terrorist dudes,

The victims of U. S. imperial feuds,

Are talented poets whose works are so prized

Libs had them all published to keep us advised

Of how we Americans practice such evil,

Subjecting these victims to years of upheaval.

Even Seton Hall Law School held sit-ins to read

These sensitive words that give hearts cause to bleed!

The Muse won’t upset any terrorist faction;

He just wants a chance to get in on the action.

His writing’s okay, and there’s this observation:

He does it in English – no need for translation!

And once he’s let go there’s no need to have qualms

‘bout the Muse killing people with suicide bombs

like Abdullah Al-Ajmi, a famed Gitmo writer

who, on his release, reappeared as a fighter.  

But liberal lawyers would like to set free

Each guilty, or innocent, sad detainee.

To people like this the Muse tenders this plea:
“At least wait ‘til my story’s been made for TV!”